I’ve discovered something about my young nephew – nothing enrages him
more than when I construct a tower of toys. No matter where he is in the room,
he immediately bee-lines for my neat little stack of blocks and knocks them
right the hell down.
If I manage to get them back up as he wobbles away, I am graced with a “are
you f*&^ing kidding me?” look as he backtracks to destroy my creation once
again with gleeful abandon.
When it comes to writing, I’m somewhat similar to my nephew in that
sense. It’s all well and good for me to actually write a story, but the fun
lies in tearing it all apart again when I’m done. Editing and revising? My
favorite parts of writing. I love knocking all the blocks down and seeing where
they fall. Only, unlike my nephew, I also love building it back up again. I
keep at this process of destruction and rebuilding over and over again, until I
charge at the story and find myself running into a wall I just can’t quite
topple.
So, I’m off to do some glorious, bloody editing. While I’m hacking
away, though, I thought I might leave you with the next round
of awesome mythological creatures that the U.S. boasts.
Fastachee
This fellow is a corn spirit connected to Miccosukee and Seminole tribes.
He generally appears as a dwarf and gifts people with corn. Of course, they
honor him for this. How could they not? Who, in their right minds, doesn’t love
corn?
Glawackus
Is it a bear? A panther? A lion? Nope. This guy appears to be a mix of
all three. The glawackus is one of the “fearsome critters” of lumberjack lore
and is thought to be native of Connecticut and Massachusetts. If the
pantliobear description isn’t enough to keep you from going camping, then let
me also warn you, the glawackus is known for his blood-curdling screams – so,
bring headphones or something.
Hudson River Monster
I’m so disappointed in myself. I’m a native New Yorker and somehow I
was unaware that the Hudson River was home to a cryptid described as looking
like an unusually large manatee. When you consider the fact that a manatee can
weigh over 1,000 pounds, an “unusually large” one would be sizable. And I
missed him! The only consolation I have is that he was spotted various times in
2006 and I was down in DC at that point. Not that my location is really any
excuse. I mean, his name is Kippy! I should have known about this. I have no one to blame but myself.
Ishigaq
This race of little people (akin to fairies) come from Eskimo legends.
They’re about a foot tall. As they leave no footprints in the snow, they are
believed to float just above the ground when they travel.
Jackalope
Another “fearsome critter” for the list! These fellows appear to call
Michigan their home. They’re hard to miss, seeing as rabbits with deer antlers
tend to draw attention. This becomes especially true when they start boozing it
up. Jackalopes are big whiskey fans, so if you too call this your drink of choice,
you’re going to want to watch that they don’t steal it. Of course, they are
also able to mimic any sound. Undoubtedly, if you hear your friend calling your
name, you will turn back to find your drink disappeared.
That draws today’s discussion of weird and wacky American
tales to a close. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have some blocks to knock down.
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