The Five Superheroes of Grief

I’ve been layering on sweaters for the past week to guard against the chill. That’s right, the chill. Because apparently being within two and a half weeks of the first day of summer isn’t enough to get Mother Nature to stop giving Maine the cold shoulder. My only recourse is therefore to focus on large-scale summery thoughts.

And what’s more large scale and summery than superheroes?

Who, let’s face it, are half-assing their jobs. For all their strengths these super-individuals seem to lack a certain amount of staying power. Sure, they show up and save the day (and scores of lives) time and time again. Don’t get me wrong, that’s great, but what is the quality of these rescued lives?

Undoubtedly, everyone’s feeling pretty elated about the whole being alive thing at first, but what happens when that survivor’s glow wears off? Everyone has to deal with the fact that their entire concept of reality has just been blown to crap. Where, might we ask, are the superheroes then? Maybe they’ve flown the coop for a romantic getaway with that special someone or really had to book it back to school for their U.S. History midterm. Perhaps they’re just settling down for a well-deserved post-averting-the-apocalypse snack.

It doesn’t really matter because the result is always the same – the mere mortals are left to Kubler-Ross it up themselves and put their lives back together piece by piece. Which is particularly unfair when you consider that these five are so equipped to help humanity deal with the various stages of grief:

Denial – Hindsight

In the wake of total and utter destruction, sometimes it’s nice to pretend that none of it ever happened. Everything’s still fine. And who better to help with that than an individual whose claim to fame is his ability to accurately analyze how events could have ended if different choices were made? Carlton LaFroyge can listen for hours while humanity goes on and on about how things are still totally the way they were – no big. And each time he’ll just sagely nod and say, “They could have been.” The main reason Mr. LaFroyge will probably be willing to tackle this somewhat thankless job is for his own safety. I can’t imagine that there is anyone the other superheroes want to punch more in the face than this guy while he’s Monday-morning-quarterbacking their most recent supervillain defeats. Additional bonus, the fact that this gentleman is so intensely punchable will eventually catapult humans to the next stage of their grieving.

Anger – Hulk

There are a lot of angry superheroes. I’m pretty sure that all job listings for the career path state, “Qualified candidates must have a constant, barely contained fury simmering just close enough to the surface that it ruins any personal relationship they endeavor upon.” However, it would be foolish of me to pretend that there is a better face for Terrifyingly Overpowering Rage than Dr. Bruce Banner’s alter ego, the Savage Hulk. Childlike and temperamental, this hero is an expert in the navigating the physical manifestations of anger, aka breaking things. Thankfully, because Dr. Banner is a self-sacrificing sort of person he’ll probably be willing to help us humans smash out our issues and because he’s a genius, he’ll probably take us in controllable groups to a place where we’re less likely to do more damage than necessary to our established infrastructure. Now, odds are pretty good that the whole of humanity will tire before the Hulk does. So, when all the anger has been forced out of you, leaving nothing but an exhausted husk, it’s time to advance to the next stage. But, let’s keep it in the family, shall we?

Bargaining – She-Hulk

When everyone gets to the bargaining stage, Jennifer Walters is who we want in our corner. Generally, a little bit more chill than her cousin, Ms. Walters is a skilled and versatile attorney. She’s represented the whole spectrum of clients – victims of crime, criminals, corporations, superheroes and supervillains. And, she’s won. A lot. Not all that surprising, when you consider her talent for seeing various perspectives – even within herself. After all Ms. Walters and She-Hulk don’t always agree on the issues and they’re the same person. This is a lady truly gifted at the art of debate. Ready to try regaining normalcy through negotiation? Call her immediately. But if you’re feeling more like getting into bed and pulling the blankets over your head for awhile, maybe it’s time to move on.

Depression – Yellowjacket

Sad Henry Pym is sad. Crime fighting just doesn’t hold the same allure it once did. He hasn’t made a big scientific discovery since those Pym particles. Even worse, his failures seem highlighted by the successes of all those around him and it’s throwing him off his game, not to mention making for a fairly miserable home life. Which kind of explains why he jumped the gun and screwed up Captain America’s plan to calm down the Elfqueen, leading to his subsequent court-martial. Spoiler alert: Things for Dr. Pym are going to get worse before they get better, making him the perfect choice for the public when they reach the stage of melancholy and despair. This guy is an expert in those feelings. Just a little tip for humanity – when Pym starts talking about how much greater the world would be if we could all just build a giant robot to attack our friends, you might want to think about scheduling a meeting with our final hero.

Acceptance – Oracle

Barbara Gordon kicked quite a bit of ass as Batgirl. Then the Joker shot and paralyzed her, ending her crime-fighting career. So, what did she do? Built a new freaking crime fighting career – continuing to help Batman, joining up with the Suicide Squad, forming the Birds of Prey, and serving as a member of a little group of well intentioned souls called the Justice League of America. Because when the going gets tough, the tough like to work with Barbara Gordon. Why? She keeps her shit together. Babs doesn’t pretend things are great – whenever her world is totaled, she acknowledges the astronomical level of suck and then keeps on moving forward. Who better, then, to help the general populace reach that final step of accepting that their old lives are over and it’s time to rebuild? Think of how full of purpose they’ll be. 

Right up until the next villain causes countless casualties and trillions upon trillions of dollars in property damage and everyone needs to start this whole damn process all over again.  

Weakness

Weakness is important in the heroes who populate our stories. It is, paradoxically, what makes them strong. Perhaps not as individuals, but as characters. 

In real life, people are weak. Not every moment of every day, but some moments of some days. And depending on the day, it may be a lot of moments within that twenty-four hour period. We all have our shortcomings - the things we get defensive over if someone points them out, because we know they’re right. 

I, for instance, have a tendency to rely heavily on sarcasm. In high doses, this can take what otherwise would have been an acceptable joking remark and turn it caustic and cutting. After which, I feel a bit embarrassed because the biting nature of what I said was not my intention.  Left to my own devises, I may find a (definitively ungraceful) way of apologizing for the offense, but if someone points it out before I can? Back goes up and I…you know…say something sarcastic.

It’s a vicious cycle. 

And I know I’m not alone in such failings. So, if we all have to suffer the awkwardness of our limitations, why shouldn’t our characters? Misery loving company and what not. 

But really, it’s the balance between strength and weakness that makes these fictional folks relatable. If they weren’t so damned proud and prejudiced, but rather completely open minded and gave each other a chance straight off the bat, would the Darcy/Bennet romance be considered such a classic? I don’t know too many people who read that book for Jane and Bingley. 

Of course, even if they did, there’s plenty of weakness there. Bingley is so insecure in his convictions that it takes little more than a few choice words from his friend to have him walking away from the woman he loves. And for all her moral strength, Jane doesn’t have much vigor when it comes to fighting for what she wants. 

Still we love these characters, not in spite of their inadequacies, but because of them. 

Hey, if Bruce Wayne can be that emotionally screwed up and still save the people of Gotham City on a daily basis, we can probably deal with the fact that we have to sit next to that one person at our staff meeting whose personality makes us want to spit nails. And if you’re occasionally a bit of a know-it-all? Well, so was Hermione Granger and look what she accomplished. Even Buffy, for all her strengths, had moments of stubbornness and self-righteousness that bit her in the ass. Didn’t stop her from saving the world…a lot. 

We all have bad moments. Moments where we let ourselves and the people around us down. The fact that fictional characters do too, makes them relatable. And can provide us some necessary hope that even with these foibles, we can still be pretty damn awesome.

Stronger Together

Recently, I’ve gotten into conversations with a few different people on the topic of Batman versus Superman. The Dark Knight Rises offers a teaser to Man of Steel, so the conversation is fairly inevitable.

Who is the better character? Let the debate begin! 

I’ve heard great arguments for both sides, but, as for myself, I tend to be less interested in which one is better and more into how awesome they are together.

There’s a reason that the two teamed up in a number of comics. They may come at crime fighting from two very different angles, but together they form a complete package. This is certainly not to say that they can’t exist on their own, but they send a stronger message when side by side.  

Much of their differing attitudes seem to be derived from their respective childhoods.

Both men are very influenced by their parents. The Waynes are murdered in front of their son’s eyes. The Kents, on the other hand, do die in certain continuities (though not generally as a result of violence), but are better known for the values which they instilled in their son than for the ways their lives ended.

One man’s course starts with his parents’ deaths, the other is inspired by his parents’ lives.

Batman embraces the shadows. He wants to strike fear in the hearts of those who strike fear in the hearts of others. Superman is a beacon of light. He inspires people to be the best versions of themselves.

Now, there’s some crossover here. Batman is certainly inspiring and if I was a bad guy, I’d probably be pretty nervous around the Man of Steel. But both heroes know how to play to their strengths.

There's a reason that so many people who I hear having the Batman vs. Superman argument relate more to Batman. Batman is the fight to overcome our past traumas without the aid of any superpowers, just through force of will and whatever resources you have handy to you (of course, Bruce Wayne's resources are admittedly impressive). But why do we struggle so to overcome these villains? Because we're trying to reach a better future. Superman is the embodiment of that hope. The promise that after our struggle we will emerge into the light and find ourselves endowed with strengths that we never believed possible.

Alone the heroes are important in their own right, but together, they’re basically the embodiment of every reason that prompts us to continue attending superhero movies, no matter how many times they’re revamped.

Assembling the Avengers

So, last night I got a super awesome fantastico graduation gift….

Greatest things ever, right? Not only have I not gotten any new Legos in forever, but Captain America and Iron Man? Hello, most badass Lego team in the world. And, to top it all off, there are pictures on the back of both boxes showing a superhero hybrid, combining pieces from both sets. 

My life is complete.

Even amid eardrum-shattering excitement (apologies to the Roomie, whose ears were bleeding a little), though, I couldn’t help but notice that Lego was kind of trying to mess with my head. First of all, what’s with the age range? 

I’m pretty sure what you meant to write was “6 and Up.” Or “Fun for all ages, as long as you don’t try to eat the pieces!” (Which only the Iron Man box really seems all that worried about anyway.)

And then there are the translations. 

Stop trying to confuse me, Lego.

Of course, all box confusion got pushed to the side as I ripped the things open to assemble my Avengers. And assemble them I did.

And it was awesome. 

  I feel much safer knowing these two are watching over my apartment.

And I kind of want to go see The Avengers again. For, maybe, the third time.