Friday, April 5, 2013

Earth Girls Are Easy Time Capsule Extravaganza (Bad Movies/Good Party Themes)

What better way to celebrate both the first Friday of the month and the letter E than with some eighties entertainment enacting extra-terrestrial’s & easy earthlings’ exploits?

Or something like that.

This cinematic classic (starring gEEna Davis and jEff Goldblum) tells the story of three aliens who receive a broadcast depicting human women. Seeing as space travel has cut in on their dating lives, they decide to make a little pit stop on our fair planet.

Hijinx ensue.

And who hasn’t thought about the arrival of aliens at some point in their lives? Whether you’re in the Independence Day/Alien/etc. camp and believe that their only purpose is to blow us out of the universe or you lean more towards the they-just-want-to-be-friends mentality of E.T. and today’s recommendation. We’ve all thought about it. Are they coming? Do they want to serve mankind? If so, in what way? That’s right, I’m not just assuming it’s in a way that’ll be good for us. Fool me once, Twilight Zone…..

But perhaps a more important question, is why are they choosing this planet to visit in the first place? I’m going to assume it has something to do with things like the Voyager Golden Record and other like projects. (I mean, who wouldn't want to come somewhere that you can eat grapes in the grape aisle??) Well, I personally would like some say in what aliens know about us. Wouldn’t you?

Of course you do.

So, get a group of your best-ies together and play this piece of celluloid history. More importantly, decide how you want to be introduced to the aliens. Everyone should bring something they would like included in the space rover time capsule. But this isn’t an unlimited-space sort of situation. Only a handful of things can fit in the capsule.

Everyone has to make their best arguments as to why their piece of humanity should be included. Majority rules.

Choose wisely. You never know who you’re going to attract.

Crackerjack dialogue to look forward to:
-          “As if things weren’t bad enough, now I’ve been abducted by aliens.”
-          “Well, I see split ends are universal. Lost in space with no conditioner?”
-          “Have a mental margarita.”

Tagline: An out-of-this-world, down-to-earth comedy adventure.

For an Earth Girls Are Easy Time Capsule Extravaganza of your very own, here’s what you need:
-          Earth Girls Are Easy (1988)
-          An appropriately sized capsule to contain all of your earthly treasures. I don’t know why, but in my mind it’s a popcorn tin. But go with your gut.
-          Table laden with all the runners for Capsule Inclusion.
-          Snacks. Always snacks. For this particular party, I would go with the foods that you would want the aliens to try first. Remember, best foot forward!
-          A group of time capsule packing experts to maximize your space and/or folks who are hoping the aliens have the technology to transport them back to the eighties and/or people who are ready to remove their tin foil hats and great our extra-terrestrial brethren with open arms.


  1. The zombies are going to take over before the aliens ever get here... :)

    1. I'm thinking you're probably right. We should put something in the capsule about the fighting of the undead.

  2. i totally love that you mentioned the voyager golden record!

    1. It's really fun to look at the photos that were included and try to figure out what impression they would give about us humans. =)

  3. teehee... yeah, I've heard the jokes about the aliens watching and who exactly they think is in charge when they watch us picking up dog poo. I haven't seen Earth Girls are Easy--came out during that media void when I was in college--but I love the question... what do we share (and has all the surveillance companies do on us via credit and debit card receipts and cameras made it VERY hard to hide?