Friday, October 31, 2014

Embracing the Creep-Out

Happy Halloween, ghouls and goblins!

Today is the day to embrace your fears, so I've decided to share a few of mine. To keep this list manageable I'm not including spiders and clowns. For one, I've already talked about them and their creepiness factors, but also, show me someone who is not at least mildly rattled by those two things and I will show a robot from the future sent back to destroy us all.

The rest of these are less cut and dry. Let me know if you're joining me in my creep-out or if these things don't really inspire the shudders in you.


Ever since I was a little kid, I've found mirrors a bit unsettling. There's the standard horror movie fear - you know, glance away from the mirror and then back to find that someone is standing behind you - but I think, even bigger than that is the fear that I will still be alone in the mirror, only my reflection will now be acting of it's own free will. That I'll be looking into a mirror absentmindedly as I wash my hands and all of a sudden my reflection will start grinning back at me. At which point I would, naturally, have to burn the house down.

Windows With No Blinds or Curtains

Even if one opts out of using said blinds or curtains, I think every window should have at least one of them - and not just for the people inside. About seven years ago, I was driving through Wisconsin in the middle of the night on my way to the World Circus Museum to do research for my final undergrad research paper. For endless stretches of road, there were no street lights, but every once in awhile there would be a glow off to the side of highway. I'd glance over and it would be a straight shot into someone's living or dining or bedroom, sometimes all of the above. Big time willies. A little bit too Rear Window for my tastes.


To say that mascots creep me out may be underselling it a bit. I don't care who the team is or what their mascot happens to be. There is nothing less likely to inspire team spirit in me than someone in a costume that fully obscures who they are coming over to dance in my personal space. When I find myself in these situation, my first instinct always seems to be to knock their comically large heads right off. This may be the reason I'm not invited to many sporting events.

Hearts Carved Into Trees

You know what I'm talking about - that age old tradition of carving ones initials next to those of one's sweetheart to demonstrate one's endless love to the world. It really gives me the willies. Forget about the environmental impact of hacking your affections into bark, this ritual begs the question: Why in the world do so many people bring knives on dates??

Other People's Dreams

This isn't an across-the-board fear. I'm sure some people's dreams are just lovely. However, I spent too many years trying to figure out why the li'l sis was mad at me in the morning only to later be told that I'd been mean to her in a dream not to be wary of people's slumbering reveries. Not to mention, well.....other reasons.

So, those are mine. What about you? Have anything you'd like to share about the things that give you the willies?

Here's some background music while you think:

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