I'd Like To See Some Dead People

Who ya gonna call?

Well, generally my answer to that would be obvious. But today, I’m less interested in getting in touch with the Busters, more with the Ghosts.

You see, there is very little in this world that I would love more than to live somewhere haunted. With a friendly ghost*, of course. I have always been against living with those who are vindictive and cruel, a rule of thumb I have no problem extending to the spirit world.

I’m not saying that the ghost always needs to be a great mood. Of course not. That’s just unreasonable. But I don’t want to have to worry about possession while I’m trying to get the vacuuming done.

Also, while I’d certainly be happy just to pal around with some apparitions, I’m actually in the market for a business arrangement. Basically, I’d like to hire a ghost.

Who better to specialize in home security?

And don’t worry, my translucent friends, I’m not just asking you to sit in the basement and rattle some chains. I would never think of pigeon-holing you in such a stereotypical manner.  

I am looking for a minimum of two ghosts to be responsible for watching over the homestead at all hours. Vacation time can be arranged, but there must always be one ghost on duty. The methods you use to protect the house will be left to your discretion. Payment to be determined.

Bitter, homicidal, or generally ill-tempered specters** need not apply.

If you, or anyone you know, fit this description, please let me know.

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In other (somewhat) related news, I have a message for the governess: I know you’re not crazy. The ghosts were real.

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Today’s breakfast recommendation: Boo Berry

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And, finally….BEETLEJUICE, BEETLEJUICE, BEETLEJUICE!

* See: Casper, Dennis Pearson, Annie Sawyer, Nearly Headless Nick, etc.

** See: Chucky, Jacob Marley, May, etc.