Monday, August 20, 2012

It May Take A Few Days....

Greetings all!

I have returned. Victorious, of course. I was quite successful in my vacating. However, being the experienced vacationer that I am, I know what's coming next – I’ll be going through the Five Days After Vacation. Here’s how it’ll likely shake down:

“Man, that vacation was awesome. I mean…I kissed a dolphin! And totally shot some arrows. Not at the dolphins! Just at targets. And it was awesome. Oh! And I saw a play! And ate my weight in dessert almost every day! Absolutely fantastic. I feel great. Going to be keeping this glow for a while. Sure, I’m back at work, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to lose my vacation shininess. Not a chance. I’ve turned a corner. Holding on to this sweet relaxed mindset for life. Hmmm, 10:13. Sounds like it’s time for second breakfast! And what time did I schedule today’s massage for?”

“Are you kidding me?!? You people expect me to do work for the WHOLE day? How am I going to have time to get to the buffet? THERE’S NO BUFFET?? This is so unfair. Why does everything happen to me? This is totally your fault. That’s right, people who worked steadily during my week of vacation, I’m looking at you. What were you thinking including me on all these emails that I now must catch up on?? All. Your. Fault.”

“Okay, okay. I get it. I’m being unreasonable. But we can work something out. How about this, I’ll read most of my emails and then I get four days off for a short snorkeling trip. No? ALL my email and three days, no snorkeling, just some sitting on the beach. Wow, you’re really playing hardball here. Fine. All my email, one substantial assignment in exchange for two days off, no traveling, just hanging around the apartment. Oh, come on! Still no? No, wait, wait! Don’t walk away. Here’s the new plan. You’ll love it! All my email, two substantial assignments, one day off so I can unpack. No? Really? All right. I guess if anyone needs me, I’ll be under my desk. I mean, at my desk! Of course. Doing all my work. I promise. Hey….would it be okay if I took a long lunch?”

“I’ll never get back on top of things. It’s just not possible. But that’s fine. I’ll just live my out the rest of my life at this desk. No more vacations. After all, what’s the point? They can’t last forever. I just end up back here. Having to do work. I don’t know what I was thinking in the first place. Oh, look, another meeting in fifteen minutes.”

“Would you look at that. All outstanding emails have been addressed and I finished those assignments? When did that happen? Guess it’s not going to be that hard to get back in the swing of things after all. That’s nice. And I really did have a wonderful time away with the fam. Well worth a few rough days back in the office. But, I am back now, and it’s time to buckle down. Other people should get to go on vacations, too. I can pick up their slack while they’re gone. After all they did the same for me. See? Things aren’t going to be that bad. Just back to the normal routine. Oooh, check out this Living Social deal for a weekend getaway. And I am still packed…Yeah, so totally back to the norm….starting Monday.”

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