How do you read?
I would say that at least eight out of every ten books I
read are completed in one sitting. When I was kid, this would have been ten out
of ten. But with work and whatnot, this percentage has taken a hit.
This kind of reading is both good and bad. Good because I
get to know what happens faster. Bad because that means the book is over.
From the second I start to read, I am at a constant war with
myself.
On one side, we have the savor-er. She’s been waiting to
enjoy this book, either for months, or since she picked it up at the bookstore
twenty minutes ago (both can seem like an eternity). She wants to take note of
every detail. Wander through the world of the book until it’s a second home.
She plans on knowing the characters better than they know themselves, on
shaking her head, small smile lighting her face, when they do something foolish
and feel a swelling sense of pride in these folks when they find their way of
out of the corner they’d boxed themselves into. She is the strong, silent type.
Calm, cool and collected.
And in the other corner, we have the sprint-er. She can see
the finish line and she wants to know what’s waiting on the other side. She’s
in love with the world and wants to run through it with wild abandon. Rather
than stopping to smell the roses, she’s gonna give them a wave as she log rolls
down a hill. She’s not at all convinced that the characters know what’s best
for themselves, but she’s willing to help them out. She starts out with some
helpful suggestions. But they just don’t listen. That’s when the yelling
begins. It’s not that she wants to give them a hard time, but come on…she can’t
just sit there. And she certainly can’t put the book down and go to sleep, when she
knows that they’re struggling. When they eventually get her message and start
getting their lives together, she knows that they couldn’t have done it without
her. She’s a little kid. Hopped up on Nesquik, pixy stix, and Mallomars.
You see, I consider myself a (relatively) sane person, but
put a book in my hand and all bets are off. Battle lines have been drawn and the fighting
has begun. On rare occasions, the savor-er wins out. She calms the Tasmanian
devil within. More often than not, though, the sprint-er seduces her over
to the other side with promises of answers to all those questions she has about
the characters and why they are the way that they are and where they’re going
to end up. Well, answers and Mallomars.
And then the book is over and the sprint-er looks over at
the savor-er and asks, Why’d you just let
me run through that?? Now it’s over! I don’t want it to be over! What were you
thinking? The savor-er loses the calm, cool and collected vibe she’s so
proud of and just starts yelling, You
never listen to me, you crazed lunatic! You just bolt through everything like
you’re a damn roadrunner. Sprint-er: Yeah,
I’d like to see your gravity
lessons! Savor-er: What does that
even mean? Okay, hold on. This is going off the rails here. It’s fine. We can
just reread
the book later.
And with that all sorted out, I put the book down and the
two sides coalesce back into one.
Until next time.
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